Bah!

If I continue to neglect my blog, I will be accused of blog abandonment but have really no time to write as am going through a transitional thing…

What is this transitional thing?

1) I moved to a new pace.

2) I did not take the I-am-so-important-job I was planning to take

3) I cut off all contact with my good friend X. I am kind of sad about that….kind of ((I hope she is sad too)).

Items one and two - have had a powerful stress lowering effect on me. This is excellent. However, the powerful stress lowering effect has produced indifference to the falling out between me and my friend. I am not registering that beyond the general acceptance of the fact. I find myself unable to respond with the appropriate levels of sadness I wish I had. A possible explanation for my inappropriate emotional response to this news is that she cut me off first so in the end is not my fault, so I don't care.

Does it make sense?

Last four years have provided me with excellent training with regard to being warned that there are many things we can't control and therefore we need to accept and move on. I might have learned not to work problems that I don't have the means to solve….

Anyway, I am re-calibrating my brain in response to dramatically lowered stress levels and dramatically unwelcome news that I can't seem to be very sad about something I should be very sad.

Thank you for reading

Ethiopia on my mind

The green lowlands, Kebri Dahar and Jijiga, erratic politicians-a difficult Government. The Somali region, so close but not accessible and so insecure. Sleeping at Livestock Research Institute because the UN compound was full already, communicating to local drivers who know everything except for the little of obstacle of not having a common language. Meskel Square and Haile Sellassie Palace. Driving the way trough Bole Road till Winston Churchill Avenue. A field spirit of friendship and comradery above all organisational boundaries. The true meaning of protection, the humanitarian imperative, the real UN philosophy, the real politick. The usual divide between field and Headquarters. IDPs first shouting at you when arriving from war-zones - desperate to get some assistance, in the end hugging you and thanking you for the work done. Injera, IAB and lamb stews, with loads of teas and coffee. Shaping a response for people in need and the knowledge to contribute to alleviation of civilian suffering. An in all of this, sleepless nights, the consideration that I am not the center of the Universe and yes some else can do all of that and will be good at that.

"I came with a smile, I left with a smile and an open heart"

All of this is there, in my mind.